Jason and the Argonauts Flee By Sea

COLCHIS (MP) -- The citizens and nobility of Colchis are mourning the death of Prince Asyrptus, the abduction of Princess Medea, and the theft of the royal treasure by Prince Jason of Greece.

According to the Colchian Department of Justice, Jason and his accomplices, the Argonauts, arrived in Colchis by boat several days previous and were hosted by the royal palace. Jason instantly demanded that King AEtes release the Golden Fleece, Colchis' royal treasure and currency standard, to him at once. AEtes flatly refused. Jason then proceeded to the Colchian Treasury, where he penetrated the outer security perimeter guarded by large fire breathing bulls. He then mercilessly murdered the duty soldiers and their sleeping counterparts and all other staff members of the building. In addition, the Argonauts kidnapped Princess Medea and forced her to chemically sedate the final defense perimeter of the treasury store, consisting of several man eating snakes. The pillagers then escaped with Medea after killing Admiral Asyrptus of the Colchian Navy, disabling his pursuers.

"I cannot believe the lack of regard for the divine laws of hospitality," Colchian King AEtes stated. "Never have I had my treasure stolen, son murdered, and daughter abducted by a representative of what will someday be the democratic capital of the world!"

Pelias, acting ruler of Greece, was quick to deny all accusations. "Jason is a mindless twit who went off on this rampage without any consent or consideration of the State Government of Greece. He will face the consequences of his actions when he returns. I fear he has gone mad--and have ordered my executive minister to take his parents into protective custody until Jason has been seized." When asked about recent rumors of the death of Jason's parents and the idea that Jason may be the sovereign ruler of Pelias' kingdom, Pelias dismissed this as "mindless rambling by idle women under the influence of black magic."

"Besides," Pelias continued, "even if the accusations against Jason are true-- which I doubt--the Colchian's are the cause of their own problems. They have never known anything of hospitality, ever since they forced Phrixus to sacrifice his divine lamb and give up the golden fleece in the first place. They are just really heartless people, and I think that anything I may have tricked Jason into doing serves them right." He later added, "Don't quote me on that."

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